Sprawl

Reading the blogs of others I've realized some things they have in common: goals they actively work toward, marriage (either working toward or recently), exciting trips, big events, etc. My blog consists of none of those things. In fact, I'm afraid my life consists of none of those things...unless you count the goal of saving for college (in which case I'm doing very poorly). For the past few days I've listed to Arcade Fire's newest album The Suburbs. Its pure genius. Driving last night I've declared it the "anthem of my rebellion." My current favorite song is right here for you to enjoy! This is the part I sing every day before I go to work:

They heard me singing and they told me to stop
Quit these pretentious things and just punch the clock
These days my life, I feel it has no purpose
But late at night the feelings swim to the surface


In other news, my friends are leading wild and exciting lives! They've been called on missions to Ogden, Hawaii, Finland, and France! And one of my best friends was married last night. It was a gorgeous reception.

Also today was an awesome day at work! One lady really liked the shoes I helped her find! She gave me a hug and asked to speak to my manager to let her know how much she appreciated the help! Hopefully she calls customer service (like she said she would) and I get a "people's choice award," in which I could use on future resumes!

Despite how nice it is to get praise, sometimes I just get really frustrated with work.  It makes me feel suffocated to think I work 2-3 jobs now and will continue to do so after I reach my goal. There will never be any rest from work for my entire life until I die. I really am afraid I'm not living my life. Call it a college-age-life-crisis if you will, but I'm concerned. Most of my friends have done awesome things like missions, marriage, traveling, volunteering, etc. by now. All I do is go to school and work. I haven't had time to volunteer for a single thing since graduating high school. Anyways, its disheartening at times.

But I am grateful to have the opportunity to move out and spread my wings, even if it is in Idaho! And I'm grateful for my family, they are my best friends and I love living with them. Also I'm grateful for employment, because even though its not my dream life, its what I need right now. And I really have great friends who are wonderful examples to me.

Anyways, thanks for listening to my rant. I am really content with life right now!

Wild Horses

K folks, your not going to believe this, but I have two more sons with the same title that are my favorite (well almost the same title). Once again the links are provided below.

And now, for some of my thoughts...

At work they play jazzy elevatory versions of popular "pop" songs like Easy like Sunday Morning (except its a techno version) Beat It by Michael Jackson, and Creep by Radiohead. I have to say...I'm not a fan...At first Beat It was disturbing, but Creep...thats just wrong. I have a lot of thinking time while I repeatedly fix shoes and occasionally help customers and I can't help but think "What the crap is Creep doing playing in a shoe store, what kind of message is that?" Lyrics include: "I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo, I don't belong here." If I was the average customer with time to listen to the lyrics I would be a little off put by such lyrics. In fact the song "Creep" was what finally pushed me over the edge and realize I really didn't belong at LVA...anyways, just a thought...

In other news, I've seen multiple people in the last month that I haven't seen since I've graduated from high school. I realize its only been about three years, but its still a little weird and kind of exciting.

Lastly, I've got myself a Pinterest. Its my downfall. I love it so much. I saw a picture on facebook that I found awesome, I dragged my mouse over it to repin it, only to discover that I wasn't on Pinterest and I may have a problem.

PS My favorite line from "Wild Horses" by The Rolling Stones is "Lets do some living after we die."

Trouble

Just the other day I realized something. Not one, not two, but THREE of my favorite songs have the same title: TROUBLE! Pretty wild, eh? You can listen to all three with the fancy youtube links provided below!

I've been reading other peoples blogs and boy they sure are great! I hope I can come up with some more interesting content. 

So I work at a shoe store by the name of DSW. We have a diverse staff at DSW. There is one cross dresser who I enjoy working with a lot, she's really nice, some gay guys; you know, just diverse. But today at closing I heard my coworkers laughing to each other.They said "I thought I saw you at Fremont, I recognized your smile!" to my manager. I asked what was going on? She said oh he dresses in drag! BUT, here's the thing. I could not tell if they were kidding. Seriously, half the drive home this is all I could think about. My manager could be gay, but I never thought a drag queen. And they sounded so jokey! How could it be real! But I do already work with a cross dresser! These are the mysteries of life. 

In other news! I have really been watched out for as of late. I feel so blessed. Recently I actually have been troubled. Worries about how I will pay for the next year of college plagued my every thought and consumed all chance of a positive hopeful attitude. Within two days, though, all these things have happened: two government loan offers (exactly enough for school), my job officially back at the library when I return to school, another housing discount at The Ridge that I hadn't realized before, a semi-commitment from the Photography company for full time work, and this week four jobs! I feel so blessed.

I've been considering progression as of late. Buddhists believe in reincarnation. Your reincarnated according to your level of progression, so if someone isn't doing as well Buddhists simply realize they have not progressed as much. I love that concept. Life is progression. I wish I could sit back and have complete faith that everything will work out (because really, it always does), but instead I mostly get seriously worried and restless. But you know what? Thats ok, because I'm learning and progressing. 

And now for a favorite quote: "The Dalai Lama when asked him what surprised him most about humanity he answered, 'Man. Becuase he sacrifices his health in order to make money. Then he sacrifices money in order to recuperate his health. And then he is so anxious about the future that he does not enjoy the present; the result being that he does not live in the present or the future; he lives as if he is never going to die, and then does having never really lived." 

Happy Sunday Everybody!

Its been a successful Sunday if you ask me! I went to an Interfaith Community forum. They are my absolute favorite. I get giddy about them! Last week was sexual morality, today the topic was evolution. It was kind of confusing for the most part; much too vast of a subject to cover in a few minutes per religion. Nonetheless it was a fascinating experience as always. I thoroughly enjoyed speaking with the Baha'i faith representative. He was so sincere, truthful, and purely awesome.

Also today was the Primary Program. Bishop Rose explained the reason we have the primary program once a year is to remind us who we need to become like, little children. I loved that. In my singles ward my testimony was confirmed once again of the power of the scriptures. Also I am so exciting to have a visiting teaching companion more proactive than I am! So sweet!

I am hoping to take up French again. J'adore cette language (English, whatevs).

It's About Time!

So I apologize for being the ultimate slacker blogger. But, what can I say? I've been relatively busy. Some weeks its non stop work, other weeks are more slow. I have four jobs. Those include but are not limited to DSW, School Photography at Capture Studio, Henderson Pavilion, and odd jobs for my Mom at Journey Education! The Lord is really taking care of me. Every week its a surprise and I never really know what it holds, but random things always turn up and save me! I've been attending the best institute class ever. Old Testament with Brother Fatheringham. I've been wanting to take his class since I was a senior in High School! I am loving it so much. Every Tuesday my mind is blown, similar to how I used to react to my philosophy classes. So needless to say, its the greatest.

I've been enjoying a few British shows like Dr. Who and Sherlock. Too bad British shows are so short! My mission friends are sorely missed by me. I talk about them a lot to my friends here in Vegas. I'm worried their getting sick of it. Belle and Sebastian have been greatly comforting lately. Las Vegas is sometimes impressive. The weather is decent. I miss the snow. And Rexburg. I detest the desert just as much as I always have if not more. Time is flying though! And soon I'll be back in my frozen paradise!

Goals for Las Vegas

I know this sounds crazy, but I am actually looking forward to moving home! Who would have thought! Needn't you worry, I am still loving Rexburg and always will, but a change in scenery is welcome.

Upon my return to my home town I will do the following:

-Finish the Book of Mormon for the year (some of which will be read in French)
-Make enough money for the following year of school
-Do my visiting teaching!
-Go to the temple once a month
-Serve my very best in whatever calling I have
-Attend mission prep on Wednesday nights
-Attend Old Testament Institute Tuesday nights
-Attend FHE Monday nights!
-Redecorate my room with the sista's
-Exercise at least three times a week
-Make all my dresses modest by employing my sewing skills
-Read one large intense book (TBD, any suggestions?)
-Run a 5k and a 10k
-Follow a budget!
-Serve wherever I go!
-Photography (which should be easy because I'm officially a hired photographer...daunting? very)

I've noticed when I stay in one place for a long period of time I'm become kind of complacent...especially here where all the crap loads of pressure I used to have with school has dissipated and now all I have to do is go to work! I've spent a lot of time playing and not enough time reading, frankly. Though, I am reading What I Wish I Knew When I Was Single by John Bytheway (Its pretty interesting).

Alright, good day to you sir!

Need. Work.

In my life I have had numerous jobs. Mostly short term obscure jobs. Consequentially, I almost always have more then one job at a time, except for when I am in school (in which case I have one glorious library job). It has become somewhat of a joke among my friends how I always manage to have 4 or 5 jobs at a time. And whats funny is people see this and think "wow, what a hard position." The sad reality is those 5 jobs amount to about 30 hours a week. Soon the time will come to leave my simple full time job in Idaho and return to the complicated web of work I've never quite grown accustomed to in Las Vegas. 

Yet, if there is any one truth I have grown to know in my years of college experience, is that everything always works out. Its just the process to get to that point that is a bit painful.

This last semesters finals were the hardest I've yet to encounter. Averaging 5 or 6 hours a sleep a night. Stress like I have never experienced. And the thought came to mind on more than one occasion "I have no idea how I am going to get this done, well time to sacrifice sleep" or "This is the most work I have ever had to do." After multiple mental breakdowns, poor grades (well B's), a new Dr. Pepper affinity, and too many days without a shower, I'm here to say I survived! And if I could survive that heck of a week, I'm sure I can survive a few crappy jobs!